How to cope with a dysfunctional family and remain sane yourself.
My birth family is very dysfunctional.
Last night around 11 pm I got a text from my sister demanding that I check email and reply to her email right away. I was already getting into bed and did not do that.
This morning I woke up and took a walk like I usually do. Then I came home and had breakfast. During breakfast at 8:10 am, I received another text from my sister, demanding that I read and reply to her email. This demanding text contained a threat to me personally in addition to her demand.
This is just the way my birth family is. My own mother does not even remember my birthday, nor have my siblings ever done that.
I replied to my sister’s text that her threat was unwelcome and that she should stop communicating with me until her anxiety subsided. I did not read her email.
Instead, I spoke with my adopted Mom about this. She gave me things to remember when I deal my dysfunctional birth family.
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About being upset.
Don’t allow others’ negativity to cause me to feel upset. When someone is unkind to me, their unkindness is not about me. Instead, it is about what goes on in his or her mind and heart and life.
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What I cannot control.
I cannot make someone care about me or treat me with respect. Also, I cannot have a healthy relationship with everyone. I cannot control others’ decisions and how they decide to treat me.
My adopted Mom loves me for who I am. She treats me with respect. She cares about me. I choose to spend my time with her instead of dwelling on the issues with my dysfunctional birth family.
So if your family is dysfunctional and you wish to be a functional human being, remember the things my adopted Mom told me to remember. Also, focus on what is positive in your life.
Think about what lifts you up.
Do not let your dysfunctional family bring you down
and poison your mind and spirit.
Let the encouraging words in these bobbiejrae posts help you
soar like an eagle above life’s storms.
Love others and be loved back…
The best gifts improve someone’s future!
When should you hold on? When should you let go?
Do you happen to know what the most important gift is?
Thank you. I’m barely surviving,–not exaggerating that word: surviving, with my family. I feel as I need to vent but have no way of doing so and then feel as if no one will understand. While misery loves company and it feels good to not be tagged teamed but to find people who understand, I hate that any of us had to go through any of this….
I pray for peace and for freedom….
I just don’t know how to get to that point anymore…
I feel lost… but thanks to your post, not so alone in this hour.
Thank you.